"Yeah," he agrees quietly, looking down into his glass as if it would hold the answers. "The ninety-six crew I lost... their deaths are on me. I knew something was wrong but I wanted revenge so badly, I didn't listen to anyone else trying to get me to stop and think." He raises his eyes to meet hers and gives a faint, humorless smile. "I know, playing the 'what if' game is pointless, but I can't help it."