nexus_sages | Hello Soldier

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Hello Soldier

There is a man in the Nexus. Standing tall, he is cut like a champion athlete or a Greek god. The uniform he wears proclaims him to be proudly American - a star emblazoned across his chest - and the shield that hangs on his back should leave no doubt as to who he is. He pores meticulously over one of the brochures, brows furrowed as he reads the strange information it provides. Having finished it, he shakes his head in disbelief before sliding it into a pocket and looking up to pay more attention to his surroundings.

"First a robot tries to take over the world and now this," he mumbles to himself. Passing a hand across his eyes he lets out a quiet sigh before straightening his shoulders and turning to the the Nexus at large. The instructions are to ask a question, and he seems to wrestle for a moment with his thoughts. Captain America has no room for doubt, but Steve Rogers? Well, he could use a fresh viewpoint, and if he's lucky this will all be some strange dream and he'll at least wake up with a little clarity.

"Duty entails sacrifice. That's a pretty cut and dried concept. How do you know if you're sacrificing too much? Is there a too much?"

((And we'll just keep this spoiler free!))

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She had thought she might find Steve here. If there was a way to return, to keep a promise, he would find it. This place seemed like an ideal solution, if an unexpected one. At least it had given her a chance to prepare for the shock of seeing him so that she didn't give in to the tears that momentarily caused her vision to blur.

He looked just as she expected. There were a few changes. His hair was different now, cut in a style that she had never seen before. His clothes were different as well, but the important things... There might be more sadness in his eyes now, the weight of responsibility showing itself in subtle ways but every detail that mattered was true.

Her lips quirked in a smile as his gaze slowly moved upward. That was an unexpected change. Steve had usually only stolen glances instead of giving her the appreciative looks that some of the other soldiers had aimed her way. It was a change that she rather liked.

"Well... if it's classified, it will be difficult to give an accurate answer." Moving closer, she couldn't quite keep the worry from her voice. "What are you expected to sacrifice, Steve?"

He'd never thought he would get the chance. As far as he knew, time moved in on direction, forward. His time had passed, Peggy's time had passed, and he'd missed it all. And even in coming to this place, he'd never thought that that fact would change. Evidently, he'd been wrong.

On his part, she was just as he remembered her. Every curve of her face, every curl in her hair. Right down to the way she dressed. Everything was exactly as he'd preserved it in his memory. It was as if she'd stepped right out of the one photo he had left of her from those days, as if no time at all had passed since Schmidt, since The Valkyrie.

It wasn't so much a once-over as it was some primal fear. Some fear that if he'd turned too fast, looked too quickly, she would disappear. It was fear that this was all some sort of dream and that if her tried to push it in a direction it didn't wish to go, it would burst at the seems and turn to smoke.

"Then again, I figure you're at least a little trustworthy." Banter, that was safe, right? That would let her know he was okay, keep the worry out of her voice. God, he'd dreamt about this moment before, but now that it was here he couldn't think of a word to say. "Don't know if it's an expectation so much as a work hazard."

He offers her a tight smile. "Things have changed, Peggy."

There was a small part of her that wondered if this was a dream but Peggy ruthlessly pushed it aside. Even if it was, she was going to enjoy ever moment of it. Too many of her dreams that involved Steve recreated the last time she had heard his voice instead of the way he smiled or the sound of his laughter. Better to have this, whatever this was, than focus on that.

"I should be. I have one of the highest clearance levels in the nation." That was partially because of Howard's influence but Peggy had earned that position. "And I was part of a certain secret project involving a stubborn artist I'm quite fond of."

Despite the teasing, concern still darkened her eyes as she reached out to touch his chest the way she had after the procedure. "It is a work hazard but we define how it effects us. Things will change but I know that they won't change you in the ways that matter. You will always be a good man."

The dreams were something they shared then. Since the thawing, he'd lost count of the number of times his dreams had found him in that ship again, hearing her voice over the radio, hearing his own make promises he knew he wouldn't be able to keep. No, this was much better. A million times better, and for as long as he could he would savour it.

"So I heard. Well-earned, I'd say." There was no doubt in his mind that Peggy had worked hard at her job, even after he'd gone under. He knew there wasn't anyone better who could have founded SHIELD. "Really? Sounds like dangerous stuff."

Teasing is all well and good, but he sees that look in her eyes, even as she must see the weight of the lost years reflected in his. "You know Peggy, lately I've started to wonder, is being a good man enough? Cause a lot of the time it's really starting to feel like it isn't."

Old habits warned her that she should step away. The fear of fraternization and what it would do to her career still lingered even if she knew those worries were untrue. Not that keeping her distance from Steve had really helped her reputation. It had been in tatters as soon as the agents at the SSR had realized who she had served with, causing another regret to go along with the dozens she had regarding Steve.

At least here no one would question her motives or her reputation. It was an odd, almost dizzying freedom to not worry about what society would say about her.

"Howard was involved. Of course it was well-earned. He doesn't do anything in half measures when it comes to his inventions." Peggy still worried about what terrible things might be locked away in some basement, but she could only do so much. At least she had Jarvis' help in tempering some of Howard's wild ideas. "It's always dangerous stuff. Like something out of the pulp novels. Explosions, car chases... A soldier with an odd fixation with a certain color scheme..."

Yes, she would tease him, try to ease some of the shadows that seemed to linger too long in his eyes, but she would also do whatever she could to support him as she always had. "Steve, it is normal to question and doubt. I don't know what has happened since..." Her voice hitched subtly but she refused to linger on what she had thought would be their last moments together. "I don't know what has happened since then, but I know that being good isn't all you are. You were the person who captured the flag and jumped on the grenade. That was more than just goodness and that was what the world needed." What she had needed as well.

Smiling wryly, she lightly smoothed out his shirt where her fingers had caught in the fabric. It was still a wonder to feel how real he was no matter how concerned she might be at what had happened to him. "I'm much better at giving you encouraging speeches when I know what subject we're discussing."

It was a safe bet that, had he been around, the 'Star-Spangled Man' would have taken great offense at the behaviour of her peers. It was one thing to be a bigot, it was another to be coward, and had he not gone into the ice, it was almost certain that none of them would have dared to treat her in such a manner. Luckily for them, he hadn't been around.

For his part, just seeing her again the way he remembered her was enough to push his heart up into his throat.

"So I noticed. His son's the same way. A little wiser though. Just a little." He smiled, letting out a quiet laugh and shaking his head at her jibe. She always knew just how to bleed the tension out of a situation. Not that it was tense, but what were you supposed to say to someone you'd abandoned, someone who thought they'd never see you again? "They didn't make me to be dangerous, they made me to be a symbol. Just got a little more than they bargained for, I guess."

His smile never faded, lighting his eyes as it always did, yet somehow not touching at all the gravity that they carried. "World's changed, Peg. I'm a relic now. Changing too slowly for the times." Not an ounce of self pity lined his voice, simply cold fact. He almost talked about her, the her he knew, laying in a hospital bed slowly dying, her mind disappearing a little more each day. But he held his tongue. Now wasn't the time for that.

His gaze followed her fingers down to where she touched him, before rising to her face again, taking her in, trying to brand every detail in his memory as best he could. "That could get to be a long story." He smiled again.

"His son?" That particular idea startled her more than the possibility of being able to see Steve again. Hope had always lingered even after she'd said goodbye and destroyed the last blood sample but Howard having a child? The thought seemed impossible... and slightly terrifying. "I hope Jarvis is there to take care of the boy." Any child of Howard's would need that sort of steadying influence.

Arching an eyebrow, her expression was a mixture of humor and disbelief. "Of course the SSR wanted their new super soldiers to just be symbols. I'm sure that Phillips hoped for every one of them to be as harmless as newborn kittens." It was an odd subject now that Peggy had done her best to destroy the last possibility of recreating the project. She hoped that he would approve of her decisions. "You were exactly what Erskine and I hoped for and don't you dare discount that or yourself because of all that silly propaganda that was released after the war.

"I do not believe that you're a relic. No more than I was after the war." Although she didn't know what exactly he was facing, she had the feeling that change would always be difficult for those with his ideals. The world kept trying to rely on simple solutions that were based in strength and fear when that wasn't the only answer. "The idea of you changing simply to fit in... That is not who you are. If it was, you would have stayed on the home front drawing recruitment posters instead of trying to enlist."

For a moment, Peggy froze when she noted that he was watching her. Perhaps she had been too familiar despite how much she had wanted to reassure herself that he truly was alive and well. "From what I've heard, time isn't a problem here."

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Hello Soldier

I am so sorry. I never got the notif x_X Thank you DW

Don't worry, I've been so busy also. >.<

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